Little Blog Of Horrors

"I've always been quite lucky when it comes to my skin" - are the words that I shall never utter again, EVER! As the last 4 months I've had a bloody tough time of it skin wise. Much worse than all of my teenage years combined. When I say I was lucky, I'd get the odd spot here and there, blackheads in the usual areas, but nothing that makeup couldn't cover or a few days of some skincare tlc wouldn't clear up. It all began the day we started filming on that last BBC job I worked on (note, this links to the very end of the post/story so keep that in mind) I came home from work, took my beanie hat off and noticed that my forehead was covered in lots of tiny bumps under the skin. They weren't sore or red, which you'd think would be okay with the addition of makeup... but that actually didn't help at all, as every little bump scattered across my forehead was still so clearly visible underneath. In certain lighting it looked absolutely awful.

I had no idea where this strange outbreak had came from, but I jumped straight in to finding a way to control/get rid of it. At first I wondered if it was my hat or hair that had been irritating my skin, so I went weeks without both and tried to pin my fringe out of the way when possible. I'm not a vain person (even if my instagram selfies beg to differ) and I would happily leave the house most days with no makeup on. But these spots really started to upset me and dent my confidence after a few weeks of absolutely no improvement whatsoever. The strangest thing of all was that they were just on my forehead, and the rest of my skin was still completely clear.

My skin under minimal face makeup 6 weeks ago

My skin under minimal face makeup now

Fast forward to today, I have FINALLY got my skin under control and have started to see major improvement. I've not been using heavy concealer as I've still wanted my face to be able to 'breathe' while having a little bit of coverage. In the top photo this was hard as my forehead was literally all lumps and bumps, but in the second photo my skin feels completely smooth and the red dots you see are flat. Which I think is scarring? I made the mistake of trying to squeeze every damn spot on there. Worst move ever. Now that the actual spots have cleared I just need to deal with the scars! But in the meantime, here's some progress pictures without makeup, and the products which helped me along the way...

The beginning

My skin doesn't actually look too bad here, but this is stage one when it was covered in all of the tiny little spots. Even though they were skin coloured and hard to pick up in photos like this under a bright light, they still looked awful side on and especially with makeup. I decided to go for a chemical peel at Destination Skin as they had some half price offers running. It was quite a strange experience and I found the heat of the peel very uncomfortable. I never actually realised how much my skin would literally 'peel' afterwards (think sunburn, all over your face, for almost two weeks) and luckily everyone at work was quite understanding of my flakey face, and I didn't need to leave the office much. My social life did suffer a bit though as I didn't want to explain to every person I met why my face resembled a character from the Mighty Boosh. Anyways, I have went off piste a bit, but after the peel I did experience a change in my skin, but not the change I hoped for.

Untitled

Week 2

Once my face had finished peeling, all of my skin (apart from my forehead) felt absolutely amazing. So clean, fresh, and new! As new skin is exactly what it was. My forehead, however... had changed from tiny skin coloured spots, to a large collection of full on, red, angry ones! At this point I popped into boots and had a chat with the pharmacist who recommended Acnecide. This is 5% benozyl peroxide and which attacks the bacteria thought to be one of the main causes of Acne. Did I have acne? I didn't really know. I knew I needed to get the morning off at some point to go and see a doctor.

Week 3

After a week of using the Acnecide, the spots weren't as angry and felt quite dried out. But as soon as I forgot to use it for one night they were red again in the morning. I finally went to the doctor for a chat, and she suspected Adult Acne, so prescribed me with Dalacin T. This is an antibiotic medicine which also treats infections with bacteria, the prime cause of skin outbreaks like this (so I was told!) All this chat of bacteria made me feel like my face wasn't clean. Up to this point I had been using a salicylic acid based cleanser from Agera in a desperate bid to clear up my skin. Along with the occasional glycolic fix pad from Nip + Fab. All in all I think I was probably overloading my face in this absolute panic. No wonder the spots looked so sore, red and angry.

Week 4

At this stage I was on holiday in Portugal and was hoping that 10 days in the sunshine would help clear up my forehead. It definitely helped! The spots started to disappear, leaving only a handful of angry ones left. At this point I felt comfortable in introducing a regular routine of the Forever Aloe Scrub as a gentle daily cleanser/scrub, and Forever Aloe Propolis Creme as a moisturiser. I continued on with the Dalacin T in the mornings, and Acnecide overnight too.

Week 5

A few days after coming home from Portugal, I went back to the doctors so we could chat about my skin again, and also address some anxiety issues which have been creeping back lately. It's really frustrating, because life is great at the moment. I am the happiest I have ever been, which makes the anxiety even more confusing as I have absolutely nothing going on that would trigger it or the panic attacks I've been having. But for now I need to accept that this is how I feel, and going back on medication seemed like a positive step for me. Initially I was disheartened because I have been off them for a couple of years now, but sometimes we need a helping hand! You wouldn't expect a diabetic person to come off their medication and fight their illness via 'good thoughts' or just hoping for the best. So for mental illness it's exactly the same. The icing on the cake is that a week after being back on the medication, my skin has came on leaps and bounds! Which takes me back to the first paragraph of this post when I said the skin outbreak started when I was very busy at work, and feeling quite overwhelmed... my skin problems have very likely been stress related all along. I'm definitely putting it down to that anyway, as I have seen such an improvement in the last couple of weeks. Even when you feel like your brain is handling stress and pressure okay, your body can start to cry out in other ways. In this instance, crying in absolute rage through my bloody forehead!

Week 6

This next picture is my skin as of Friday just there. As I mentioned in the first photos with makeup, my forehead is totally smooth now and the red marks which are left appear to be scarring. They are not raised or sore, so hopefully now I can continue confidently with my skincare regime and perhaps add something in that will help with the marks which are left. Or maybe they will just fade in time! If you have any products you could recommend to me at this stage to help with that I would really appreciate it. You can imagine I'm a bit scared to overload my skin again, or chance putting anything on it that might make me take a few steps backwards. I've been staring at these photos for so long I'm not sure if I can really see a big difference between them, but I know I can feel and see it on my face. After a wonderful consultation and mini facial at Kiehls on Buchanan Street with Fay, I've introduced their Iris Extract Activating Treatment Essence*, and their Blue Herbal Moisturiser*, which are both really helping too!

My daily skincare products

Acnecide (from Boots) before bed, and Dalacin T (prescribed from the doctor) in the mornings.

Forever Aloe Scrub - I use this as a scrub and cleanser, as it's gentle enough to be used daily. I'd quite like to replace this with another cleanser soon and just continue using it as a scrub. Any suggestions?

Iris Treatment Essence - I pat this gently all over my face morning and night, after cleansing but before my moisturiser. It makes my skin feel so soft and plump!

Aloe Propolis Creme - My morning moisturiser. It has quite a smooth matte finish that absorbs quickly, which makes it a perfect base for your makeup too.

Blue Herbal Moisturiser - This is my night time moisturiser, it's oil free and feels really nourishing, and contains salicylic acid acne treatment which gets working on your face overnight. Giving all the more meaning to the words beauty sleep!

I couldn't give all this chat about skincare products without mentioning the makeup that has been my saving grace throughout this whole thing. Bare Minerals have just launched their new Blemish Remedy foundation*, which I have been testing out on the weeks leading up to its release. It's specifically designed to help promote clearer skin and keep blemishes at bay, and it was a big weight off my shoulders to know that I could still wear a kind and gentle foundation throughout this process of clearing up my skin. The powder has a lovely smooth and silky finish, and the coverage is buildable so it was easy to pop on some more for the days my red skin needed hidden a bit more. I'm wearing it in the first two photos of this post, and for a nice coverage on my face I've not needed to put on much at all, but you can still see the breakout on my forehead a little bit. So I tend to build it up more in that area - but hopefully not for too much longer. If and when my skin does clear up fully, I'll still continue to use this as my daily foundation. It really helps control the oil and shine that I experience after a few hours of wearing most other medium to full coverage foundations.

How is your skin looking at the moment? I think my experience has been down to a mixture of stress and hormones, as I hadn't been doing anything differently in my daily skincare and makeup routine up until that point. Troublesome skin doesn't just end along with your teen years, and I really take my hat off to anyone dealing with full blown adult acne. I never realised how much your skin can effect your confidence on a daily basis. My friend Heather gets a lot of bad outbreaks whenever she eats/drinks soy based products, which I was quite shocked at! So I'd be interested to hear what you think effects your skin, from the inside and out.

A couple of months ago I wrote a blog post about the mole removal I had booked, after years of wanting to do it. Two weeks ago on friday, the day finally arrived! I met up with my friend Ashley in the morning for a coffee and a pep talk, and she walked me over to the Transform clinic in Glasgow city centre.

In the few days leading up to the procedure, my nerves really started to kick in. Sitting in the waiting room that chilly friday morning was the most terrified I have been in a very long time. Although Transform were fantastic in answering all the questions I had, there was still a massive fear of the unknown for me. What would the jag feel like? Would I be able to feel the actual procedure? How would my face and the stitches look afterwards? How would it heal? Does it hurt getting stitches out? What if I have made a wrong decision by doing this and my face looks strange? My brain was working at a million miles an hour with my anxiety at an all time high. The waiting room was comfortable but quiet, and I was pretty sure anyone in there would be able to hear my heart beating fast inside my chest. Give me a tattoo or a piercing any day - this fear was like no other.

And guess what... it was the easiest thing EVER!

I lay down on the bed in between my nurse Claire, and my surgeon Mr Ottoviani. They were both so upbeat and chatty, with banter flowing and a very reassuring tone to their voices. You're probably reading this and thinking getting a mole removed isn't a big deal? But for me it was! Especially since mine was in such a prominent place. The fear of the procedure its self along with how I would look afterwards made me feel sick with worry on the day. I have to give extra thanks to the nurse, she held my shaking sweaty hands the whole time which was a much appreciated source of comfort and reassurance. Mr Ottoviani was also very patient and gentle, which I was very glad for as I was scared of him being patronising or shrugging me off - purely because the procedure was so simple! I guess I had to experience it myself to believe it. I was literally in and out the door in 23 minutes. It wasn't rushed at all so it felt a lot longer than that! The numbing jag was just a tiny nip, and after that I couldn't feel a thing. I kept my eyes closed as the mole was being removed and again when he was stitching the wound up. I spent the week after that with a small dressing over the stitches, and for a day once I had them removed. So I hadn't felt much of a difference up until that point as the mole could still have been hiding under the dressing (of course it wasn't! haha)

On the weekend just there I went up to Aberdeen for a relaxing hotel stay with Pete. This was the first time I'd taken the dressing off after having my stitches out, and my face felt so different! There is still a little patch of redness on the skin where the stitches were, but this will fade with time and become the same colour as the rest of my face. Over the next few days I can start to conceal the redness with some makeup, and hopefully quite soon all I will have left there is a little white scar. I've got a follow up appointment soon to see how everything is healing, and I am honestly so chuffed with how it's all gone. I couldn't have done it without the kindness and support of everyone at Transform. It took a lot of bravery for me to finally take this leap and remove something that has been a part of me for so long. Transform took my hand and guided me through it all. If I had known how easy it was I would have done it so much sooner! Their motto is 'When you feel good, we feel good'... so I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank them again from the bottom of my heart, and say I feel good.

This month has very much been a completely fresh start for me. I feel like I've hit the massive red 'reset' button for my life. I won't lie, I'm scared... but it's definitely been a long time coming now. I wrote back in January an outline of my goals for going into this new year, and I think I've realised now that my happiness and self development is an ongoing thing, which will never really be 'ticked' off the list upon completion. Like one of my favourite quotes - 'Happiness is the journey, not the destination'. It's great to have daily goals, short term goals, and hell even long term goals! But the wholesome and healthy state of mind in which I'd like to live my life is an ongoing work in progress. Some days will be better than others, I may take a few steps forward then stumble back again, but that's okay. I'm only human. We all are. I recently read The Book Of Brave by Laura Jane Williams, and her words could not have rung more true to me at this moment in time. "Fucking up isn’t failure for as long as you have values, and you stick to them. If you go off-course, it’s about how you bounce back from that"

In my holiday post I touched briefly on a book I read, The Crossroads of Should and Must. "Should" is what we feel we ought to be doing, or what is expected of us. "Must" is the thing we dream of doing, our hearts desire. It made me clearly think about what I do in my life for a career, and what I do for fun. I came to the (maybe obvious) conclusion that my main job is working in tv/film, my blog is a hobby (not something that I make money from, but of course it has it's fun perks) and a third project I have recently undertaken is sort of a mixture of both. Before I talk about this final project I just wanted to touch slightly on blogging for a hobby or as a business. I truly lost myself in a whirlwind of shit content a year or so ago when I tried to monetize my blog and work on paid posts. You guys hated it, I hated it, it just wasn't me! This isn't my job and neither do I want it to be. As soon as I tried to think of it as a job, I was being professional but I also had a rod stuck up my back that completely killed the life and soul of me and what I try to communicate through this little piece of the internet. I want to write here because I enjoy it, and I want others to enjoy this space with me. There is no right or wrong way of doing it, apart from knowing now that if I lose myself, then I lose the soul of this blog and why you guys come and share these life musings with me.

Anyway I have went off piste now but I do hope you understand where I am coming from (miscommunication is my biggest fear and hate, which explains why I tend to talk TOO MUCH) The point of this post is to share with you all my new facebook community, The Good Life 365. It's a wellness project where over the next year (and hopefully beyond) I'll be posting daily doses of inspiration, suggestions, progress and positivity. These will range from body image and health, to skin and beauty, to career, recipes, general well being, and everything in between.

My updates will focus on a healthy body and a healthy mind - and ultimately the best advice anyone has ever given me, to be kinder to ourselves. The super talented Ella Masters created the branding for me, and I couldn't be happier with how my logos turned out! That girl got skillz ^_^ Overall, it is really scary to think how I can come up with something decent enough to share every single day for the next year!? And a part of me thinks I'm crazy for taking on yet another task when I'm trying to work on my stress levels and not feeling too overwhelmed. But I'm just taking it a day at a time, and to be honest it has been quite a positive commitment for me to sit every day, even just for 10 minutes, and create some positive content to put out there. It has been helping me so much on my journey, and I hope I manage to help others too.
good life 365

I started this project off the back of my new Forever Living business. You'll have heard me mention them a few times in the last year, after completing their C9 cleanse twice, continuing on with their aloe vera and shakes to help move towards my goal weight, and introducing their completely natural and cruelty free makeup and skincare into my day to day routine. You're probably reading this thinking oh YAWN the post has taken a turn for the worst, network marketing blah blah blah, just another Arbonne/Avon/Younique or whatever the hell people are trying to flog on Facebook these days. I am very sceptical about most things in this day and age. But Forever products have been improving my quality of life for a year now, which is why I decided to become an independent distributor. I am loyal to the brand because their products have done so much for me! So I just wanted to take this opportunity to introduce my new venture to you guys. I've had some really happy clients so far, and hope in time I can find people with a work ethic similar to myself to join my team. I actually met my manager through working in tv and film, as she was a makeup artist for a lot of big celebrities. She now works with Forever full time, and having her train me has been so much fun. It doesn't feel like work at all. "Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life"

To celebrate the launch of my Good Life 365, I want to give away one of our best selling products - the C9 cleanse. It's a 9 day cleanse which gently rids your body of harmful chemicals and built up waste matter. Safely removing these toxins ultimately results in weight loss and inch loss. The body does detox itself, but the C9 helps it do so more efficiently. I'm on my third cleanse now, the healthiest and lightest I've ever felt in my entire adult life, and only 6lbs away from my goal weight now. It isn't a fad or a quick fix - it's the spring board many of us need into creating and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. No more silly diets or dangerous yo-yo methods, I treat my body right and this lifestyle change is a long lasting one for me, and every person I have coached through the cleanse so far. I've got some client progress photos over on the 365 page (or I can send you them along with some more info if you'd like!) They've all continued on with drinking the aloe vera every day, and I was so chuffed to get a text from Sally today to say her weight loss has continued and she's now 9lbs down. Feeling healthy and comfortable in our own skin is something a lot of us struggle with, and I can't even tell you how long I have struggled personally. Our bodies are fantastic, complex machines. We need to be good to them!

I'm giving away a cleanse to one lucky reader. It's worth £108.95, so I hope this can be the perfect kick start to a healthy new lifestyle for someone who might not have been able to afford it at this moment in time otherwise. You will receive full support and coaching from me throughout the programme. I'm currently on day 8, so I'll be sure to post my results on instagram/twitter later in the week. If you have any questions about Forever, their products, or about joining my team then just drop me a message. I know it's not for everyone, but this C9 has worked really well for me and millions of others so far. Even if you don't enter the competition, be sure to pop over to my 365 page and say hello :)

a Rafflecopter giveaway

A couple of weekends ago me and Pete escaped into the countryside for a relaxing break together. We drove up to Aberdeen for a 2 night stay at the Mercure Aberdeen Ardoe House. Relying on a satnav and their postcode which covered quite a big area we got a little bit lost on the way, but the hotel staff were able to direct us with no trouble at all when I phoned in a panic (getting lost and being late are my number one worst things, ever!) Turns out it's really only 10 minutes from Aberdeen city centre, cleverly nestled amongst the beautiful countryside.

Once checked in we walked along to our room, and did the standard 'oooh' and 'aaah' inspecting every nook and cranny and reading every piece of hotel literature. Does anyone else do that when they go into a new hotel room? Having a wee nosy at the tea bags, toiletries in the bathroom, and shouting 'I'VE FOUND THE HAIRDRYER' after rummaging through all the drawers. Our room contained a nespresso machine which Pete was very pleased about. So we had a quick coffee, unpacked and headed down to their Soapies brasserie for a light bite before bed. I went for the haggis bon bons with whisky sauce, and Pete had the bangers and mash. A perfect supper after the 3 hour drive from Glasgow.

We got up bright and early on the Saturday morning, went down for breakfast then had a walk around the beautiful grounds. There was a wedding on that evening so the red carpet had been rolled out and a lot of smartly dressed guests arriving. Ardoe is definitely the perfect venue for a big traditional Scottish wedding! In the afternoon we went down to chill out in the spa and get some treatments. I had a hot stone massage and Pete went for the deep tissue massage. The therapists were very attentive and we both left the spa on cloud nine. I wanted to sink back in to our fluffy, comfy bed but we needed to start getting ready for dinner. The only thing I would say is their actual swimming pool and sauna area is looking a little tired. The hotel has recently had a refurb and the Spa could do with being done up to these same modern standards also. The treatment rooms were atmospheric and cosy, and I can't fault them or the quality of the treatments themselves! They were fantastic. Pete's therapist did tell him that the spa is next on the list to be given a face lift, which I think is a good move for the hotel to bring it up to standards of the rest of the surroundings.

Pete popped down to the bar to watch some football which gave me time to get dolled up for dinner in peace! I very rarely have lots of time to get ready, so I took advantage of being able to keep him waiting while the footie was a suitable distraction haha.

Starting with the hidden details, because why the hell not? I got this beautiful Freya Bra and thong set from Bras Galore, and had been waiting for a special occasion to wear it. It fits my shape so well and made me feel quite sexy for once! I'm allowed to say that, yes? Yes, okay!

Don't worry, I didn't go down to dinner wearing just my underwear. On top I wore this two piece set from Luxemme, and some black heels from Primark. I fell in love with the scalloped edges of the top and skirt, and against the plain peach colour I feel like it made my tattoos really stand out! They've sold out of this set now (no wonder, it was only £35) but they still have loads of other styles on there for ridiculously good prices.

We had dinner in their main restaurant, Blairs. It was very atmospheric and in a stylish setting compared to most traditional hotel dining. We felt like we could have been in a fancy, bustling restaurant in the middle of Glasgow. Service was a little slow between courses, but they were really busy and the waiter apologised for this. I'm a sucker for good customer service, and less likely to get annoyed if the staff actually communicate with you - which they did to a stellar degree! So gold stars all round. We were quite happy sitting deep in conversation with wine flowing anyway. I really wanted to squeeze in dessert but I was absolutely stuffed after my black pudding and scallop starter, and fillet steak for the main. Full bellies and feeling a little tipsy, we headed back to the room to Netflix and chill. Haha, just kidding - cosy up in that beautiful big bed and watch a film.

On the Sunday morning we decided to pay £5 extra and have breakfast delivered to our room as a little treat. Man it was worth it! We both had eggs benedict, coffee, orange juice and a selection of pastries. All while wrapped up in our big dressing gowns propped up against a mountain of pillows. Breakfast in bed is what Sunday mornings are made for, right?

We were quite sad to wave goodbye to our castle come midday on Sunday, but we left feeling relaxed and refreshed. The sky was blue, sun was shining, so we put on some tunes and enjoyed a chilled drive back to Glasgow. The cats were very patiently waiting our arrival after Jacs kindly watched them over the weekend for us. If you're looking for somewhere to spend a special weekend away with a loved one, I would definitely recommend Ardoe House. Me and Pete have vowed to do as many little trips like this together as possible. It's easy to get into a routine when you live under the same roof, so spending quality time together is really important to us. You know what they say, a Sunday (and a Friday, and Saturday...) well spent brings a week of content!

We were invited to spend the weekend at Mercure Aberdeen Ardoe House in exchange for a review. All opinions of the experience are my own and completely honest, as always!

Anxiety is a funny old thing. The term is often thrown about very loosely, along with depression and OCD, from people who don't actually suffer from it - but use it as a verb to generalise how they are feeling. Getting worried, experiencing lows, or being someone who likes things done a certain way is completely normal. But once you truly suffer from these illnesses and perhaps need to go for counselling or be medicated - you understand the difference between what is normal, and something that stops you from functioning in your daily life. The above are just examples of the many, many mental illnesses out there, but today I'd like to talk openly about one which I suffer from myself. Anxiety.

Ever since I was a little girl I've always been a worrier. I would get quite upset about being late, letting people down, or any sort of miscommunication between myself and others in my day to day life. I have been this way for as long as I can remember, so initially it was really hard for me to differentiate where my personality ended and my illness began. I'm quite a methodical and organised person. I write a lot of lists, which are essentially my coping mechanism and sort of 'risk management'. Being this organised means I feel prepared for whatever life is going to throw at me, but it also means when things don't go to plan or happen the way I expected them to, I become really nervous and upset. I beat myself up about the unexpected because surely if I had been MORE organised, and thought things through even further, that no unexpected happenings could possibly have slipped through my net. And so begins a vicious circle of over thinking and over preparing for the simplest of tasks, and then feeling completely defeated if I lose control of the situation and something happens which I hadn't planned for. Then there's the flip side of when I am completely organised, and everything is going to the 'plan' in my head, I start to worry because surely I should be suspicious that things are going so well? Surely I have missed something? I can't relax and enjoy the moment because I'm waiting for that bad thing to happen. I worry about not having anything to worry about. Hope I haven't lost you here... but welcome to my brain.

There is still a lot of stigma attached to mental health. I often refrain from opening up about it in a work setting because as a freelance person, in a high pressure job, I still worry that if colleagues knew the extent of my anxiety then they wouldn't want to hire me. Which is ridiculous, because I am perfectly capable of doing my job, and I know fully that I am! It tends to be when I've came off of a job that I feel the anxiety creeping back in. The momentum of work keeps me going and then when that stops, I feel like Wild E Coyote with my arms and legs spinning in the air before he drops down into the canyon.

The most frustrating thing is that life is bloody good right now, the best it has ever been. I am so content and happy with my life and the people in it. So when the anxiety takes hold it becomes even more frustrating. Like I said, I'm a very methodical person and completely aware of my emotions and how irrational they are. Yet I just can't control them. But it's an illness - you wouldn't expect a diabetic person to not take their insulin and for their blood sugar levels to be stable. It's the exact same when it comes to anxiety. After struggling on for a while, I took a massive dip a couple of months ago when I got back from Portugal and decided to go back on medication. I am on flouxetine at the moment but have also been on citalopram and beta blockers in the past, but I find that the flouxetine works best for me.

I'm not ashamed to share this, and I'm not offended if any of you are shocked because in the past I've had people say to me things along the lines of 'Oh but you seem so confident and upbeat' and 'You don't act like someone who is depressed or anxious'. There are stereotypes everywhere in the world. But quite often from the outside it would be just as hard to 'guess' if someone had Asthma, as it would guessing if someone had Anxiety. My friends and family are aware of the telltale signs of when I am struggling, but to a person outside my close circle, or a colleague at work, they would never know. That's especially why I love the quote 'Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle'. A polite hello, a positive interaction, or a simple smile from a stranger on the street to a helpful shop assistant can go a long, long way.

Dotted throughout this post are pictures of things that make me relaxed and settled when I am feeling a bit down. I am doing so much better since being back on medication, and the CBBC job I have just finished was a great boost to my confidence and a positive transition back into work. My Forever Living business has been going really well too, and I feel bad for not blogging in a while but this is the first chance I've had in a couple of weeks. I'm beginning to be more realistic with what I can achieve each day, working on my priority list and knowing that right now I am doing the very best that I possibly can. Tonight Pete is out at band practice, and tomorrow is my last day at the BBC so I felt a little shadow following me around the house when I got home (which is my anxiety, not Binx! Although he has also been following me as you can see above haha) I'm convinced that animals know when you're feeling down. The cats haven't left my side all night! On a really anxious day, this is my fail safe evening routine:

1. Run a bubble bath and light some candles
I've been having so many baths lately that I am down to my very last bath bomb from Lush! It becomes an expensive habit when you're having one every second night. I got a beautiful new lavender and basil candle when I was at the recent Liz Earle event, along with a relaxing lavender and tea tree one from Arran Aromatics. Lavender is great for making you sleepy, so they're the perfect accompaniment for bath time. My wee light up rubber ducky from Joy is also a necessary new addition. He makes my bath water look like a galaxy!

2. Cosy up on the sofa in my pj's
Maybe the cats really only flock to me on the sofa because I'm a wee cosy source of heat. I finally got some new slippers from Spartoo and I think I'll need a new dressing gown soon as this Joules one is a little worn now (all the paddy pawing from Binx for hours and his claws catching has loosened a few threads!) My hot water bottle doesn't actually contain any water either, its a rechargeable heat pod from Dreamland. Genuinely the best thing to happen to me since these colder months have started to set in. Lasts much longer than an actual hot water bottle, and no messing around with the kettle and boiling water. Plug it in for 5 minutes and you're ready to go. Popping it under the covers ten mins before bedtime is the best bloody thing ever.

3. Zone out of all social media
Depending on if Pete's home or I'm alone, I'll watch a film or read some magazines, and recently I've started to dabble in some colouring books which Dom and Katrina bought me. I'm not a big fan of using pencils, I'd love to do them with watercolour if the paper was a bit thicker. I also think a colouring book full of Ella's artwork would be awesome!(She did a great little colouring competition at the London Tattoo Convention last year)It's really beneficial to stay away from social media when I'm not feeling great. It's just a distraction that sometimes ends up making you feel worse when you're already in a wound up mood. There's something really satisfying about being engrossed in a film or some colouring rather than constantly refreshing facebook. Oh, and cups of tea always make everything better. Especially when it's tea in a unicorn mug.

Thank you for letting me share my experiences and current situation with anxiety. If you feel like you are struggling and aren't quite sure what to do, I urge you to talk to someone - you are never alone. More people feel this way than you could imagine and the stigma attached to talking about mental health simply needs to get tae'! (followed by the F word) If you would like a little daily dose of positivity and inspiration, come over and follow my Good Life 365 page. I'm always just an email or message away if you want to chat. I'll leave you with this fantastic quote from The Book Of Brave by Laura Jane Williams:

"Gratitude and kindness. Self-regulation and humour. Zest and appreciation of beauty, wisdom and integrity, citizenship and fairness. Social intelligence. Perseverance and empathy. That’s success. That’s human-ness. That’s how to get through this mind-fuck of existence"

I feel quite baffled at the contradicting advice constantly given to women.

The way we dress evokes "What a plain jane, she's so boring, I'd love to give her a makeover" to "Look at her wild dress sense. You call that fashion? What an attention seeker!"

Our choice to wear makeup goes from "Oh you look very pale today, are you tired? Are you feeling unwell?" to "You wear far too much makeup! Don't slap it on - embrace your natural beauty"

The expectation for us to have children starts with "Oh, you had a baby in your teens? That's very young..." to "SO, when will you two start trying for a baby?! You don't want kids? Why not?"

Talk of marriage is often met with "Oh don't rush into settling down, you've got plenty of time!" to "When will you two finally tie the knot? Hasn't he put a ring on it yet?"

Sex shaming is probably the biggest contradiction of them all "Oh you were still a virgin in your twenties? You're a late bloomer aren't you!" to "She has slept with HOW MANY guys/girls? What a SLUT"

I recently stumbled across a box of old photos at my Grans house. In my teens, filled with selfies and smiles at a time where disposable cameras were how you documented holidays and nights with friends. I cringe at how bloody difficult it was to navigate through puberty. The mistakes I made, the lies I told myself and other, the situations I got myself into, the people I wasted time on. How much I beat myself up about every damn thing. I wish I had taken my Mum's advice about each situation and why I shouldn't worry. She had been there before, and now I have been there, and now my 11 year old sister is already starting to experience it too. With peer pressure and bullying at school. All this shit goes in the exact same cycle. Nothing changes. I thought it would get easier as we get older but now I realise that it doesn't. The only thing that changes is we start to give less of a damn about what every other person thinks.

makeup

Hello, here's my face. Packed full of makeup! Warpaint well and truly in place. Is it wrong that I feel nice when I take time to make myself look good? Is it wrong to even verbalise that I think I look good? Is it wrong to take a 'selfie' to document how I look, and then feel nice when people comment on it? I really don't know anymore, which is why I've ended up doing a lot of internet reading about it in the past weeks. We have been described as the selfie generation, narcissistic and self obsessed.

“Selfies have become an acceptable way to communicate. It’s the modern version of peacocking because, as more of us are meeting and communicating online, that’s how and where we project ‘ourselves’. Humans have always done this, whether it’s with cave paintings or self-portraiture – it reaffirms our identity. It’s a natural evolution.” - psychologist Diana Parkinson

Social media and camera phones now make it ridiculously easy to document your life online for other people to see. So I was interested in the link between this, and why I used to use disposable cameras to take loads of pictures that no one would see, apart from myself and close friends and family. I didn't upload any of these pictures to the internet, I wasn't trying to prove anything to anyone. The photos ended up in a shoe box under my bed. Yet I still managed to pull out a load of selfies from these photographs.

"Selfies have been around for ages. Nope, think way before MySpace default photos and its characteristic angles. Before the camera self-timer. Before cameras. In the 15th century, self-portraiture allowed artists to control the images and versions of themselves the public saw. During the Renaissance, commissioned portraiture was standard practice among the era's elites, a status symbol. Today, people carry high-definition cameras in their pockets, making it possible to snap photos of themselves whenever, wherever. The selfie barrier to entry is no longer the wealth, time and privilege of a French monarch. The selfie game is close to a level playing field, so go out and play, Marie Antoinette" - Marissa Cretin on mashable.com

makeup

My nose is healing up well after the recent mole removal. In this instance I don't regret having a cosmetic procedure to alter a part of my body which I wasn't happy with. If anything, I wish I had done it sooner! However I feel like a mole removal would be less judged than someone wishing to get a nose job or boob job. These people are getting the procedures for the exact same reason, yet if it's not for health related purposes, they can be described as vain? I really don't understand.

“Being overly concerned about pictures of yourself doesn’t make you a narcissist. It’s entirely normal, and from a survival perspective helpful, to be obsessed with gossip about yourself, pictures of yourself or responses to you online. Such status anxiety is part and parcel of being in a society. [We] are interested in what friends and family are doing, saying, thinking and feeling – particularly if it’s a response to us. This is how we establish our place in society, how we form supportive relationships with like-minded people.” - Dr Kelly McGonigal, a psychologist and the author of The Willpower Instinct.

Ocean Personal Loans got in touch to ask what I would do for an hour/day/afternoon/evening of relaxation. So y'know what I did? I had a total ME day. I went to see Paddy at Rainbow Rooms George Square for a haircut and colour, I took my time in doing a full face of makeup, I painted my nails, I went for a wander around the shops, then came home and had a massive clear out of my wardrobe for ebay/depop. A simple but selfish day. If you're reading this and think I sound like an absolute dick, then I would urge you to have a day like that to yourself soon. I feel like everyone needs it every so often. In all honesty, you deserve it too! Being so busy with work I was envious of people on instagram heading out for coffee and lunches, having lazy mornings in bed, and posting photos with immaculate makeup and beautiful outfits. I was jealous because deep down I needed a bit of time like this for myself. Not because I wasn't happy for people who have their shit together. It's because I wanted a bit of time to zone out from the constant overwhelm, and get my shit together too!

The Face:
Naked Pallete by Urban Decay // Precision Gel Liner in 'Glimpse' and Highlighter in 'Gleam' by Illamasqua // Bronzer in 'The Skinny Dip' by Bare Minerals // Finishing Powder, Precision Eyeliner, and Volumizing Mascara by Sonya // Luxury Face Primer, Lipstick in 'Sadie Doll', Blusher in 'Honey Bell', and Foundation in 'Porcelain' by Sara Hill // Hair by Paddy at Rainbow Rooms George Square (What a perfectionist he is - I've found my new favourite hairdresser and colour expert)

The Nails:

OPI Colour Paints in Silver and Pen In Paint // Custom Dexter decals by DIY Nails // Sealed with gel topcoat using GelTouch (perfect way to make your home mani last longer!) // Crossbones ring by Bloody Mary Metal // Semi Precious stone ring by Noxious

Ultimately, I'm not really sure what the point in this post is. I guess I just wanted to say I have finally realised that it's okay to do what YOU want to do. The lazy mornings in bed eating leftover pizza and ignoring all of life responsibilites, having kids at a young age, not wanting to have kids at all, dressing as a super sexy version of whatever the hell you want for halloween, flying solo to a wedding or party, asking your Mum to come to a hospital appointment with you, and to hold your hand the entire time. You don't need me or anyone else to tell you what to do, or what is 'expected' of you. Like Dita Von Tease wisely said, You can be the ripest, juciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches. Be proud of yourself. If you want to post that gorgeous, over-filtered, sexy, pouty selfie then do it. As women, I feel like the world would be a much more pleasant place to navigate if we spent more time supporting each other (like we do in drunken nightclub bathrooms) rather than trying to tear one another apart. I am nervous for the journey through early teens which my little sister is just about to embark upon. I hope that my advice and support will bring comfort to her, but I know it probably won't. She will feel like the only female in the world who has experienced heartache, peer pressure, bullying, hangovers, shitty exam results, periods, breaking your virginity, and everything in between. If she can learn from my tears and fuck ups, or find any comfort in knowing she is not alone, then that makes every second of my life experiences so far even more worthwhile.

"Self love and narcissism are two different things. It is not a crime to feel pretty, it is not a crime to take a photo and share it. It is not a crime to show the world that you, a real live breathing human being, feel pretty today. It's okay to be pretty. Really, it is. Look at yourself in the mirror and say "that is a damn fine human being" and the sky isn't going to burn up, I promise" - Redheaded_Dancer on readwave.com

I love Glasgow. You mighta guessed that by now though, huh? I lived in a little town 20 minutes outside the city with my family until I was 21, and for the past 5 years have lived in and around Glasgow. At the moment I'm in the South Side, and it's so handy for jumping on the train into the centre (takes about 5 minutes!)

Even if you are very familiar with Glasgow, or have never been to visit at all, I really hope you enjoy this post. Travelodge asked me to 'flaunt my haunt', so of course I was more than happy to do so. Last week, Ashley and I got all wrapped up and headed into the city for a whirlwind trip to some of our favourite haunts.

We started off our day by going for breakfast at Bills on West Nile Street. Ashley had the vegetarian breakfast, and I went for strawberry, banana and blueberry pancakes with bacon (hold the banana) and a coffee each. I've been to Bills for lunch quite a few times now, but this was the first time I'd been in town early enough to nab their breakfast menu. It was DELICIOUS! I really don't like the massive american style pancakes that are the size of a dinner plate. These ones were small and perfectly formed, and I scoffed every last piece. Ashley isn't even veggie but the breakfast caught her eye, and she thoroughly enjoyed it.

After breakfast, we climbed what felt like a thousand steps to the top of The Lighthouse, Scotland's national centre for design and architecture. This was a bit of a slog with full bellies, but the view at the top is worth it. You can see across the whole of the city, with the vast mix and styles of buildings which make up the grids of Glasgow city centre.

After burning off a few calories from our Lighthouse climb, we popped round to the Gallery Of Modern Art, which has the famous Wellington statue on it's doorstep, complete with traffic cone on the Duke's (and sometimes the horses) head. This cone has become quite an iconic part of Glasgow's heritage, and the council had plans to raise the statue higher up to stop the cone being placed there (which they apparently spend £10,000 a year in sending staff to remove... whoops!) However this proposal was protested fiercely, with thousands of people signing a petition against it. Stay classy, Glasgow! I bloody love you.

On display outside the GoMa at the moment is Ross Sinclair's light installation 'We Love Real Life Scotland'. The gallery steps are quite a nostalgic and special place to me in Glasgow, as I have early memories of first meeting my Dad just around the corner from here at George Square when I was a little girl. My Mum often used to drop me off at these steps to meet him at weekends. It is a very central spot, and when you are arranging to meet someone in town it will often be a choice between 'meet me under the big clock in central (station)' or 'meet me at the GoMa steps!'

Just around from the gallery is another favourite place of mine and Ashley's - Tempo Tea Bar! Delicious bubble tea served in the cutest of surroundings, owned by brother and sister Liam Tan and May Gem, who saw a gap in the market and decided to bring this tea based drink from Taiwan to Glasgow. Business is thriving and I've just spied that they are about to open a second shop at Silverburn Shopping Centre (which is just a 10 minute drive from my house, result!) This is another great place for a mate date. I'll always swing by for one even on my lonesome if I have popped into town.

As if coffee, breakfast and bubble tea weren't filling enough, we took a walk through the Merchant City and stopped off at the ice cream parlour Jelly Bear (planning to have another coffee) Did we have that coffee? Nope! We went for an absolute sugar coma instead! Ashley got the chocolate brownie waffles and I went for this smarties, marshmallows, sprinkles and candy floss creation. It was ridiculous and fantastic at the same time (that's what I get asking for the girliest thing on the menu) For £6, I easily could have shared this! I won't be so greedy next time.

Our eating was well and truly done for the day at this point, so we went a walk around some of the shops before heading for the train home. I have so many favourite places in Glasgow for shopping, drinking, and evening meals too. So if you are ever visiting and would like some recommendations let me know. I know a lot of people who visit Scotland come to Edinburgh, especially for the history and the beautiful old buildings and streets. I love Edinburgh too, but for different reasons! Compared to Glasgow they are like chalk and cheese. Let's just say Glasgow is Edinburgh's edgier, trendy and slightly rough younger cousin! I am very proud to call this place home.

The Finnieston area in Glasgow's West End is such a cool hub of bars, restaurants and quirky little shops - So it was no surprise to see another trendy indie brand pop up there recently, in the form of Iolla. I've worn glasses pretty much full time since I left school, after ignoring my severely less than perfect eyesight to the point I was suffering from terrible tension headaches. I'm not one for contacts (think Rachel and the eyedrop scene from friends) and feel so creeped out at the thought of putting anything on my eyeballs! I'm sure for regular contact wearers it's an absolute breeze, but for me it is out of the question. Plus, with so many awesome styles and colours you can choose from in glasses these days (no offence to Harry P style NHS glasses from the late 90's...) we really are spoiled for choice! Your choice of frame and colour can totally compliment your own sense of style, allowing your glasses to become a fashion statement as well as a necessary daily item for folk like me with not so great eyesight.

You'll find most clothing designers these days have their own eyewear range. I've been a sucker for some expensive frames in the past, and as much as I love them, the pressure is on if you lose them, scratch the lense, sit on them (I've been there with all three, god damn it) Plus, sometimes you might want a few different pairs so you can chop and change your style, right? For me, this is where Iolla comes in perfectly. I booked an appointment online, went in a couple of days later to try out some frames, and a week after that I had my glasses. All for £65! For an new stylish brand like this you would expect to pay a lot more, as in the past I have paid 3 x this for a pair of frames, and that's not even including my lenses with prescription. All of the eyewear at Iolla is designed and manufactured in Glasgow, and they pride themselves on quality at an affordable price. Just what I like to hear, and seeing is believing!

Honesty bar

I felt like a judge on the Xfactor whittling my top 5 choices down to the winning pair, which is these Arrol frames in Blue Havana. What do you think? I have taken my specs on a proper road test before posting this review (as you can see my visit was pre-haircut!) and I can genuinely tell you, never will I spend £120+ on a pair of frames again when I can get this quality for half of the price. You can't really tell from the photos, but my frames are a sort of transparent brown with teal flecks through them. They suit my eye colour really well, and Iolla took the time to properly tweak the frames and fit them to my face. So no more sliding down my nose, sore spots behind my ears where the legs press against my head, or eyelashes hitting against the lens. Such simple little changes which makes wearing them really comfortable, to the point I forgot I've had them on a few times and have went hunting around the house... only for them to be on my face, doh!

Girls with glasses

If you're in Glasgow I definitely recommend popping by the showroom to have a gander at the frames they have on offer (I'm especially looking at my bestie Leah with this one, we are gonna break your Raybans addiction!) The staff are super helpful and extremely knowlegeable when it comes to what shapes and colours will suit your face. I'm also a bad one for using the side of my dress or jumper to clean my glasses, and they gave me into trouble for that! If you haven't used a proper glasses cloth to clean your lenses in a while then do it. I promise that the world will seem in HD all of a sudden. My boyfriend really likes them too, he thinks the style and colour suit me down to a T. So, it turns out boys DO make passes at girls with glasses!

Thank you Iolla for hooking me up with these much needed new specs. All reviews and opinions are honest and my own, as always!

It's no secret that I absolutely love Halloween and dressing up. This year was mine and Pete's first Halloween in the flat, so we decided to throw a wee pre-drinks party before heading out to a club with friends. We literally live across the road from said club, so it's pretty handy! I'm not one for going out every single weekend, but I do quite enjoy getting dolled up for a special occassion - and Halloween is a super special one in my books.

Pete got us a load of alcohol from his work and made up a spooky punch, along with some test tube shooters while I decorated the flat, then we carved some pumpkins quickly before our guests arrived. Now onto the outfits...

We had a go at a couples costume and went as Owen Grady and Claire Dearing from Jurassic World. I Love Fancy Dress saved us with a last minute order when we realised we were missing one crucial component... dinosaurs! Haha so these three little inflatable ones were our Raptor pals for the evening. They made it to the club and back again in one piece! The dinos were next day delivery, and I had bought ALL THE SNACKS but hardly any decorations, so we got some random body parts, severed heads, cobwebs, inflatable skeleton and a mini graveyard to help spruce (or spook!) the place up.
Halloween Cat

Pete: Shirt - Debenhams // Waistcoat - Ebay // Trousers, belt & shoes - Models own

Ayden: Shirt - Primark // Tank Top - Ebay // Skirt - Miss Selfridge // Shoes - Primark

We managed to scrape both our costumes together for pretty cheap. Pete only had to buy his shirt and waistcoat, and I had no trouble finding any of mine apart from the skirt. It is SO HARD to find a white skirt in that style, in October. So I know it's not as close to the characters as I hoped, but it was the best I could do for this time of year. We dirtied our clothes and faces down with some fake blood and brown face paint, and luckily I didn't need to wear a wig since Paddy had already sorted my hair out for me! I knew I needed it in that style for halloween, but now that's out the way I think I'm going to let it grow for a bit. Claire is naturally quite pale in the film (well, before she gets covered in dirt and blood!) but I popped on some Fake Bake 5 Minute Mousse on my legs, arms and chest just so I would look healthy, rather than transparent, which I usually am at this time of year haha. Portugal tan has well and truly faded folks. Damn you, Scotland!

I bought a witch and devil outfit from Poundland for Dexter and Binx. Dexter was wandering around with his little cape and horns on, but Binx wouldn't have any of it! So I guess you can say he just went as Binx from Hocus Pocus... easy costume for him eh? I didn't get a photo of all the guests, but everyones outfits were awesome. It was a nice surprise opening the door to various unexpected characters, from Johnny Bravo, to Vikings, to a Unicorn, and Bellatrix Lestrange! Are you a fan of Halloween and a big kid like me? Tell me what your best outfit has been!

I'm sorry about the post title, you're thinking Christmas - right? Not quite yet. But it is gonna be upon us very soon so I hope all the Bah Humbugs out there can stop resisting it angrily and just LET IT GOOO. (See what I did there? Frozen, Christmas... again, sorry!) Anyways, before I fully embrace the festive period into my warm bosom, this time of year has another reason to be wonderful. A week ago today, I got to watch one of my blogging besties get married.

I met Claire, through blogging, about 5 years ago now. However we do have a whole bunch of pals in common, and our other halves know each other, so I maintain that we would have met eventually if it wasn't for our social media channels. But thank blogness we did meet! I cried happy tears for Claire, watching the place filled with love and happiness from all the fantastic people around her and Paul. They are a truly awesome pair of human beings.

How down right beautiful is this girl. Paul is so dapper too and looks mighty chuffed as they walk back down the aisle together ♥ I'm at that age now where a lot of my friends are settling down, getting married and having kids. Claire's big day was the first time I have ever stood and taken a moment to myself and felt like my heart was ready to burst. It was a beautiful day, and it has made me excited about what the future will hold for me and Pete. I feel SO ready to be doing all that 'grown up' stuff. They say when you know, you know, right? I say grown up, because at 26 I still feel quite young and that I am winging it through life. Owning a business, running a house, looking after animals, being responsible for feeding and clothing myself. I know that probably sounds really silly, but I hope some of you know what I mean. I take comfort in the thought that I'm not the only person in my late twenties making this shit up as I go along.

Tub Of Jelly Photography took the photos on Claire's special day, and Bygone Photobooth set up in the evening to capture moments from all us drunken wedding revellers! Claire's 'beesmaids' looked fantastic too, and it was great to see all the girls again after a weekend of bonding over prosecco and a hot tub up in Aviemore last month. I am a bridesmaid for my friend Heather next year, and last Friday got me even more excited for her big day. I've cried so much at my friends weddings that goodness knows what I'm going to be like on my own wedding day. Industrial strength eyeliner and mascara please!

Jumpsuit - George // Furry waistcoat - George // Handbag - Spartoo // Shoes - Jeffery Campbell Lita's

The weather is quite bleak in Glasgow at the moment, so I only managed to get a decent photo of my outfit once we got home (oh hey, sassy drunken eyes) Most of the girls had been talking about their outfits at Claire's hen, and I was terrified at how organised they all were! Can't expect any less from a bunch of fashion savvy beauties. So when we got back I decided to get a move on and find an outfit. I knew I wanted something nice I could wear on Christmas day too, so this black jumpsuit from George did just the trick. Not my usual style or colour choice (I tend not to wear much black due to one reason - Dexter!) but I wanted to try something new since it was so reasonably priced. I teamed it up with the faux fur waistcoat (again, out of my comfort zone but I love the ombre from grey into black) and because the trousers were too long for me I popped on my grey Jeffery Campbells for a bit of height. Plus they were comfortable enough to dance the night away in.

I was quite adventurous and used a dark shade of tan from Crazy Angel, which I was initially worried about when putting it on as it was extremely dark. Luckily it washed off like a dream the next morning and left with me with a lovely healthy glow underneath. Which is only now starting to fade (evenly, might I add, thanks to the tan extender) a week later. This tan is not for the faint hearted though, so if you are a first time tan user or not confident about your application skills then I would recommend using something lighter. Finally, you are probably wondering WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR MAKEUP WHO ARE YOU?! Well if you can't get super dolled up for your friends wedding, when can you? I decided to treat myself and book into Onyx for my makeup. Jamie Genevieve is one of the artists there, but I was booked in with Jane on this day. They are £35 for full makeup and lashes, and it took about an hour and 20 mins to do my face. Would I go there again? Without a doubt! I got a bit carried away though in telling Jane to go all out (ie full blown drag queen) on me, as I was so excited about someone else doing my makeup. I loved the look but I feel like it was a little too strong for me. I'm not confident to pull off that amount of makeup and I ended up feeling paranoid at peoples compliments, automatically returning them with 'Oh god, it's too much isn't it? I love it but it's too much!'. Jane still did a fantastic job and contoured the hell outa me, along with those big bold brows, super smokey eyes and perfectly applied lashes. Next time I shall maybe go for a slightly less intense look though. But boy, it did feel good to be fierce for the day!

What would you wear to a winter wedding? And do you prefer pj's or party dresses on Christmas Day?

I can't believe that tomorrow is the first of December. Where has this year disappeared to?! I have just started doing my Christmas shopping in dribs and drabs, and I've really had to rethink my game plan this year. I have a lot of family and friends to buy for, and I absolutely love buying people presents. I just don't know where to stop, and when you end up spending £30+ for over 20 people... It all starts to add up. We've got a house, a puppy and a holiday to save for next year, so I've tried to be a lot more savvy with my present buying this Christmas. I'm trying to gift everyone with just one really special pressie, rather than 3 or 4 (often daft) things each. Does anyone feel like just one present feels really lonely? For example if I bought a friend a new diary from Paperchase, I'd need to get the matching pen, desk planner and other little bits for them... This is how it gets silly and out of hand!

I actually feel a bit awful writing the above when there are so many people on this planet who don't even have a roof over their heads or a warm place to sleep at night. So I'd like to even up the materialistic side of this post and say if you're in Glasgow, Edinburgh or Aberdeen doing your Christmas shopping, please pop into Social Bite for a sandwich or coffee. 100% of their profits are given to good causes, and 1 in 4 of their team are formerly homeless people. They also feel the local homeless community through their 'Suspended Coffee and Food' initiative. This means that customers can pay in advance for a coffee or any item of food from the menu, and a local homeless person can come into the shop to claim it. Social Bite are based in Scotland, but I can imagine there are other similar ran Social Businesses across the UK. Please take 5 minutes to look one up, and give a little kindness to those who really need it most at this time of year.

bathmas

There are a million and one gift guides out there at the moment, some with unique hand made gifts and awesome Etsy finds - but I wanted to keep mines old school and share some bath time favourites. I know bath smellies can be seen as a rather traditional present (or a total cop out as Pete said to me! In the gift aisle at Tesco next to the Lynx box sets...) Unwanted little plastic wrapped wicker baskets and boxes of old lady perfume smelling soap sitting at the back of your bathroom cabinet until the following Christmas. I personally LOVE bath related goodies! No bubble bath goes unused or any piece of soap unwrapped in my house. So I thought I'd share my favourite products which no one would want to re-gift or shove to the back of a drawer after Christmas.

1. Nut Cracker Travel Bag - Feel Good // Arran Aromatics // £15
First up is this lovely lil' Nutcracker travel bag from Arran Aromatics. I am a total sucker for cute bags that come with sets like this, they're perfect for trips away and make great makeup bags too. This one contains a Lip Balm, Bath Salts, Hand and Nail Cream, Grapefruit and Shea Butter Soap, a Mini Travel Candle and a Body Polisher. I love the branding across all of their Nutcracker Gift Sets, super cute and super festive!

2. Orange Flower Body Gift // Liz Earle // £27
Liz Earle is known for her fantastic skincare range (big up Cleanse and Polish you absolute savior) and I love the fact that she's got some bath/shower goodies too. This set contains an Orange Flower Botanical Body Wash and the matching Botanical Body Cream. I love fresh citrus scents so this would be a perfect 'wake me up' smell in your morning shower.

3. Astronomical // Lush // £22.95
I couldn't speak about bath gifts without talking about Lush! I've been working there over the festive period doing stock and visual merchandising, so it's been fantastic to get to know all the products a little bit better (and also seriously dangerous for my bank balance) This Astronomical gift set initially caught my eye with the packaging, and contains an Intergalactic Bath Bomb, Monsters and Alien Fun, The Comforter Shower Cream, and the Experimenter Bath Bomb. Stardust and Snow Fairy's Castle were a close second to this set. I just want all the things.

4. Poptastic // Soap & Glory // £18
Soap & Glory are a classic Christmas favourite of mines. It wouldn't be the festive period without people losing their sh*t over the famous Hat Boxes! They have a bunch of new gift sets out this year, but my faves are the limited edition online exclusives which were made in collaboration with Philip Colbert. Poptastic contains mini's of Clean On Me Shower Gel, Hand Food Hand Cream, The Scrub Of Your Life Body Scrub, Heel Genius Foot Cream The Righteous Butter Body Butter, and a full size Original Pink Body Spray.

5. Dolce Dreams Blissful Bath Trio // Fake Bake Beauty // £35
At the recent Fake Bake event I was pleased to find out they have a delicious smelling bath and body range out called Dolce Dreams. Everything in the collection smells like cupcakes, ice cream and sugary sweet treats. I have the Lemon Meringue Body Whip and it smells good enough to eat. This bath trio set contains Coconut Macaroon Body Scrub, the Lemon Meringue Body Whip, and a Honey Brulee Bath Drizzle. Be careful not to eat your bath bubbles, no matter how good they smell!

6. Ginger Pleasures // Origins // £45
The Ginger Souffle body cream from Origins has to be one of the best things I have ever smelled, and each year they bring out a set containing a bunch of their Ginger goodies. The one I have chosen for my gift guide is called Origins Ginger Greats, and although it's the priciest of the bunch, if you have tried anything from this range you'll know it's totally worth it. This set contains the Ginger Souffle Whipped Body Cream, Ginger Burst Savory Body Wash, Ginger Essence Intensified Fragrance, Incredible Spreadable Smoothing Ginger Body Scrub, Ginger Gloss Smoothing Body Oil, and a Body Puff.

So, there you have my favourite selection of smellies which no sane bath lover would turn their nose up at this Christmas. Writing this post has really got me in the mood for running one myself. Merry Bathmas to all, and to all a good night!

This post was written in collaboration with Mira Showers. Appreciation of all things bubbly and bathtastic related are my own honest opinions, as always.

2015 has been the year of skincare obsession for me. After my skin took a turn for the worst (pretty much out of the blue) back in the spring, it has been a long and frustrating struggle to work out why it happened, and how to maintain the progress I have made so far. I last blogged about my skin back in September, so I thought I'd give you another update a few months on, and share what products I have been using.

Finally, my skin is making steady improvements rather than what seemed like one step forward and two steps back for a series of months. My forehead still isn't completely clear, and I was worried that the addition of a fringe (brushing against it every day, any grease/oil from my hair etc) might aggravate it more, but luckily it has made no difference whatsoever.

The progress I have made in the past 3 months is really down to being extremely strict with my skincare regime. No more jumping from product to product, trying one for a week or so and then giving up. I have stayed completely faithful to a daily plan using Merumaya products, along with the Ultra Facial Cream from Kiehls as my moisturiser.

Kiehls

I start off my day by double cleansing, first using the Melting Cleansing Balm, followed by the Luxury Facial Wash, then the Iconic Youth Serum. Same again in the evening with the addition of the Concentrated Spot Treatment. I also had a little sample of the Mud Marvels Mask and the Skin Brightening Exfoliating Peel. After using both I actually really prefer the peel, it gets slightly nippy after around 5 minutes but my face feels amazing afterwards. I have been using that a couple of times a week to really help what constantly feels like clogged pores in my forehead and chin. I will definitely repurchase this, as I think a lot of face masks feel like more of a 'pamper', which isn't actually doing anything for your face apart from feeling sort of nice. The peel feels like more of an actual facial! Something that is really working proactively for your skin. That's one thing I would say about all of the Merumaya bits I have tried so far, they smell and feel like the sort of products you would get at a proper facial. If that makes sense? The Concentrated Spot Serum is my absolute fave though, I pop it on before bed wherever there are some angry red spots on my face, and by the morning they have totally calmed down and reduced in size, without simply just drying them out like some products do. It definitely speeds up the process of blasting those blemishes!

Even though I had defined my skin as oily, I was making it worse by being afraid to moisturise twice a day. I knew I'd need a slightly heavier moisturiser to help over the cold winter months, so this terrified me even more! I didn't know how my skin was going to react, but luckily it was a good move. I've been using the classic Kiehls Ultra Facial Cream, which is currently partnered with the MTV Staying Alive Foundation & Tinie Tempah and supports raising money and awareness for HIV. It is absolutely perfect for this harsh weather and is extremely hydrating, so I'll continue using it into the spring and summer months next year (or until the tub is done, basically) I can't believe previously I thought a product like this would be too heavy for my skin, when in fact it's been just what it has needed.

Happy skin means that I've been much happier putting on my makeup too! I love a medium to heavy coverage at this time of year, so the Wonderwear Special Effect Foundation has been my new BFF. I LOVE it. It's a sorta hybrid between Illamasqua Skin Base and Estee Lauder Double Wear. I am also the proud owner of the new Gwen Stefani Palette from Urban Decay, so I've been having a lot of fun with that over the festive party season. IT'S JUST SO PRETTY. I feel like this is the only eyeshadow palette I need in my life right now haha. I tried to recreate the look Sara Hill did for me at her Christmas Pop Up Shop and Glitter Bar at Number 659. Her copper glitter matches my hair perfectly, but I wasn't able to make my eyes look quite as sassy or smoky as she did. But hey, practice makes perfect and all that jazz. I also think I am very much over the Illamasqua brow gel. As much as I've loved it this year, I think it's safe to say I need to tone them brows down a bit and go for a more natural look. Or even just a bit less defined. Any suggestions? I have a couple of new eyebrow bits to play with, so I'll be sure to let you know how I get on. The hair is finally in the shape and thickness I've been aiming for, so now I think they need a makeup make-under!

How is the winter weather and party season taking it's toll on your skin?

At the age of 26 I still don't feel like I'll ever be too old for a sleepover, even though my 11 year old sister has just started going to her first ones (and she thinks I am totally ancient!) I've mentioned it before on here, but I am still amazed at the close friends I have made through blogging. When I started this blog at uni I never realised that it would introduce me to people who would become friends for life. Crying with laughter together at girly weekends away, crying over a cuppa in the kitchen at whatever shit life has thrown at you, and crying tears of joy watching them get married. Happy tears and happy times with a lot of these wonderful humans! A couple of weeks ago I was invited to a midweek festive sleepover with Laura, Lynsay, Lori, Lisa and Sami at the Grand Central Hotel in Glasgow.

T-shirt Dress - Spartoo // Furry Gilet - Asda // Snood - Story Horse // Shoes - Topshop (Old)

I turned up at the hotel in a comfy little outfit I could lounge in, only for us to change into animal Kigu's not long after arriving. I managed to win a prize for best instagram photo after running downstairs and getting a picture in my kigu at the main entrance to the hotel (which is rather fancy, but every fancy hotel needs a pink unicorn, right?!) I literally just missed the red carpet laid out for the Small Business Awards also on at Grand Central that evening, which would have been the icing on the cake haha.

TALKING ABOUT CAKE, oh my goodness. This salted caramel chocolate and popcorn cake (aka The Beast) from Three Sisters Bake was the most insane thing I have ever seen and completely delicious. The Tempus Restaurant put on a fantastic spread of canapes for us, including adorable little deserts and macarons, but I had to make sure I had space for this guy at the end. I love tapas, buffets, finger food and canapes (I take after my foodie mother) as I would prefer a big mix of lots of little things, rather than a massive bowl of the one thing. You know it's been a good scran when you have to lie down on the floor halfway through for a 'rest'...

We had a lovely evening chatting over food and cocktails, watched a couple of movies and had a giggle until around just after midnight... when we retired to bed realising maybe we weren't teenagers anymore who could stay up until the wee hours of the morning (Okay Tyler, maybe I am ancient now after all!) I've actually had my Unicorn Kigu from Tickled Pink for over a month now, so this picture gave me mega LOLZ as I felt like I was finally part of a little kigu clan! Rather than just wearing it in the house while getting funny looks from Pete and the cats chasing after my tail. The suite was the perfect size for us to have this gathering in, and I'd definitely recommend the hotel to anyone coming to Glasgow for a visit. You literally could not be more central.

After a sound sleep in the comfiest of beds (luckily Lynsay missed out on my usual snoring that night, I must have been out for the count!) we got up the next morning and went for a coffee before heading our separate ways. Back to work, off to meetings and appointments - I felt like adult life resumed as soon as I stepped outside into the crisp Glasgow streets. Prepared for rain, I'd worn my new Story Horse raincoat, but Glasgow actually stayed dry that morning! So I managed to squeeze in the last of my Christmas shopping before heading off to a nail appointment at Swoon in the afternoon. I was a right wee right tourist in my own city, leaving my overnight bag at the hotel so I could head out for some hands free shopping. I'd been denying those 'festive feels' before the sleepover, but that morning was the first day I thought okay, Christmas is almost here and I don't want to fight it. I actually sorta like it! I can't thank Laura enough for arranging such a lovely, relaxed evening for us girls. It was nice to take a little pause during what can be a really overwhelming and hectic time of year.

Special thanks to Edinburgh Woolen Mill, Arran Aromatics, House of Fraser and Benefit Cosmetics for providing us with goodie bag treats and game prizes, along with Funkin Cocktails, Diet Coke and Thorntons for the drinks and snacks!

Oh y'know, Christmas! (Or maybe Catmas, which will sound more appropriate by the end of this post) I feel like that last blog post opened the floodgates for my festive cheer to come pouring in. Panto time, Christmas tree decorating, present wrapping, and watching some feel good festive films on TV. This jolly and sparkling time of the year is definitely in full swing.

The week after the sleepover I went to see my first Panto of the season with Claire
at the Tron Theatre, which this year is Sleeping Betty. The Tron is venue quite close to my heart after studying theatre at uni and working on a few plays there. They always put on a fantastic show, full of hilarity and often with a wee Glesga' twang throughout. Not to say that you wouldn't enjoy this panto if you weren't Scottish, but a lot of the jokes really did tickle me as a Glaswegian. We did not stop laughing and smiling throughout the show, especially at Handsome Dan (the fanciest dancer in all of the land!) I will definitely be taking my brother and sister back to see this, and if you get the chance to go then I promise you won't regret it! I find Pantos (and pretty much any shows to be honest) much more enjoyable in a decent sized theatre venue like the Tron or The Citz, rather than a massive, soulless auditorium which is meant for concerts and trade shows. The atmosphere at the Tron is so cosy and magical, you'll be immersed into panto land from the word go.

Tron Starter

The Tron have recently relaunched their Bar & Kitchen, so Claire and I had a catch up over a bottle of Prosecco and their Pre-Theatre menu before the show. I think this is the first time I've eaten a pre-theatre menu, before actually going to the theatre! It was 3 courses for £16.95 (or 2 for £12.95, but who can say no to desert?) and I went for the Chicken Liver Pate and Oatcakes to start, Fillet of Grilled Shetland Salmon for my main, and a Christmas Pudding Cheesecake for desert. I checked the menu again today and it looks like some of the dishes have changed already, which I was surprised about (but I actually quite like that) I would be even more inclined to revisit the bar & kitchen knowing there were always different dishes on offer. However I'm also quite sad because I've been pining over the the Pate and the Cheesecake since we left! The salmon was delicious too, and the saffron and roast pepper cream gave it a real christmas twang. I think I'll probably have had around 5 unofficial christmas dinners before the big day (hey, not that I'm complaining)

Back in the flat, me and Pete got dressed up in our Christmas Jumpers and hats from George
while decorating the tree, and Pete made us some delicious christmas cocktails too. I got some pre made mulled wine from Wholefoods at the weekend (much to Pete's dismay) but I prefer to just drink it sans alcohol. I was a bit worried at how long the tree would last, as Binx completely demolished my Grans tree last year and she had to take it down on boxing day! Luckily this time he's not been trying to climb it, but has just had a sly nibble on a few of the branches instead (and finally stopped, when he's realised they don't taste very nice)

Christmas Flowers

Binx is a kitten stuck in what seems like a panthers body. I got these beautiful Christmas flowers from Blossoming Gifts, and he will not bloody leave them alone! I adore the colours of this Mistletoe arrangement, and love the fact that it has a little Scottish twist with some blue eryngium, which look like baby thistles. I'm always on the look out for cat friendly bouquets, as you might already know Lily's are poisonous for them. Dexter would never bother with flowers, but in the last few days as the bouquet has started to look a bit tired (it has lasted a lot longer than I expected it to) and I've been finding little rogue petals in Binx's bed. What is it with cats and christmas trees or plants?! I would buy them even more often if I didn't need to worry about petals being nibbled. If you'd like to treat yourself to some lovely festive flowers, you can use the code BGIFTS33 to get 33% off a bouquet! (This excludes the 'Flowers By Post' range)

The next morning when Pete went to work, I moved the living room table out of the way, locked the cats out (becoming a theme of this post, yes?) put a movie on and set about wrapping my christmas presents. I really do not enjoy wrapping at all! Despite being a creative and somewhat neat/tidy person, I just don't have the patience or talent for wrapping gifts. I would quite happily pay someone to do it for me. They always end up looking like a bit of a dogs dinner. Or should I say cats dinner, don't even start me on Binx breaking into the living room and stealing various tags and bits of ribbon haha (AND breathe) I got my wrapping paper and charity cards from Paperchase, along with ribbon and tags from Remnant Kings, as I wanted to add a slightly different feel to my wrapping this year. Not quite sure what those wooden tags are actually for! Or what exact 'feel' I was going for... plus I wish I had nicer handwriting for everyone's names. Despite that, I'm quite pleased with how they all turned out. I also went down a more personalised route this year for a few of my gifts thanks to Zazzle, along with a couple of custom backpacks that arrived for my little brother and sister a couple of days ago. Growing up I was never able to find any personalised things with my name on them, and I found it quite exciting to customise some gifts for my family. I've been using adobe illustrator a lot for work this year so I was pretty impressed with the editing software on the site. There are so many options for customisation, every item I chose ended up looking nothing like the original product photo on the site, but in a good (and unique) way.

I wrapped the last of Pete's presents today while he's been out at work, and tonight we are going for Christmas dinner number 3 with my grandparents. I finish up my christmas temp job at lush next week too, and plan to just work on my Forever Living stuff from home as and when I need to over Christmas and New Year. It will be so nice to have a wee break, I can't believe this crazy year is almost coming to an end. We are spending Christmas Eve and morning in the flat, then Christmas day at my Mums, but I hope to have another wee post squeezed in before then. Hope you are all having a good week, and for those who work in retail... I hope your coffee is strong and your shifts are short!

I'm in a bit of a strange daze right now, mainly because my belly is full of pizza and Christmas chocolate and I've been sleeping silly amounts the past few days. It has been so nice to switch my brain off over the festive period, but now it's got to the point that even when I check my phone I still can't remember what day or date it is. The last week has been a total blur of food and laughter, between spending Christmas Day at my Mums, Boxing day at my Dads, and then the day after up at Pete's Dads. It was lovely to get out of the city, get some fresh air and go for walks (So although I've been quiet on here you can still follow my daily updates on Instagram)

I'm really looking forward to cracking out my new diary and notebook (okay, notebooks...) and getting organised for 2016. Along with getting back on the healthy living wagon. Seriously, I look about 5 months pregnant and feel hella sluggish! One of the pressies Pete got me for Christmas was a nutribullet, so I look forward to whizzing up ALL THE FRUIT AND VEGGIES while praying my body forgives me for how indulgent I've been. I had a glass of water this morning and it tasted like sweet nectar, as if I've been trawling through a desert for all of December. Caffeine and alcohol, y u no hydrate me? I feel bloody broken! 2016, I am so ready for you.

Normal service shall resume in the New Year, but I just wanted to pop my head in and say hello before then. How are you doing? How are you feeling? I know this time of year can be a big mixed bag of emotions for a lot of folk. Don't put yourself under ridiculous amounts of pressure for a 'new you' and a 'new chapter' as of 12.01am on 1/1/16 - this can start any time of any day, it doesn't need to be the 1st of January. You can start living the life you truly want to live, as SOON as you let yourself start living it. I've been following Cleo Wade on Instagram and have found a lot of comfort in her poetry and artwork. 'Let go of the old parts of you that you don't need. It makes room of all of the newness you do need'.

I hope we can all find it in our heads and hearts to keep life that simple, and not over complicate it, because guess what - it doesn't need to be complicated. A massive lesson I had to learn this year, which broke my bloody heart but at the same time I am grateful for those people and the experiences which they brought me. As soon as you become accepting of certain situations and how you can't control the outcome, then that internal war is over and you can save your energy and patience for a place which actually needs it. We win some battles and we lose some. Take whatever lessons you can from each one, brush yourself off and keep going. You've come this far, why give up now? We are literally all just making this shit up as we go along! This is coming from someone who worries herself sick about every god damn thing. I look forward to facing more things that scare me, because once I've experienced more and more of them (and realise that they don't kill me) I can confidently shout NEXT, please! Hopefully with time, less of my fears will actually phase me. I know that you can do the same, too.

Clear those cobwebs from your head, speak honest words to yourself, and just take baby steps towards whatever direction you want to move in. We are forever changing and forever developing through life, and all at very difference paces too. Wish your neighbour well on their journey and always extend a kind hand if they need it, but never forget to extend that hand of kindness to yourself too. I'll leave you with some photos and a short video I did with Boya of Moveit lookbook last month, which was another massive fear I managed to tick off the list! I'm always in my comfort zone shooting with Ashley, but posing for photographs with a complete stranger filled me with absolute fear. Luckily I had no reason to be worried at all, as Boya was absolutely lovely and it turned out to be a really fun afternoon. I'm definitely a firm believer in what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger!

Hat - Abandon Ship Apparel // Jewellery - Noxious and Bloody Mary Metal // Dress - Topshop // Bag - New Look // Shoes - Adventure Time x Doc Marten // Jacket - Spartoo

If you do make one goal for the coming year, try to do something every day that scares you - I promise you won't regret it. Lets support and help each other along the way! I feel like I have come quite a distance since I wrote this post last January, and I'm a lot more calmer and connected to life and the people around me. I treat myself like a best friend rather than a bully, and that internal voice is no longer something that shouts and knocks me down at every opportunity. I've realised how important it is to have a healthy inner dialogue with yourself (I don't mean an imaginary friend, you know the voice I'm talking about! Hopefully... haha) Thank you for another fantastic year of blogging, reading, listening, talking, and friendships. I'll be raising a glass to you all at the bells! I'll see you on the other side...

Who am I kidding - it doesn't take the excuse of a new year for me to go for a new hair colour (much to my hairdressers dismay...) After having lovely orange and copper locks for a few months, I decided it was time for a change. Timehop had been reminding me that two years ago I went blonde, which I really loved. I started to get major hair envy over my own old photographs (THAT BITCH, I want her hair!) I only went and ruined it by dying it blue, thinking that the blue would fade out to a nice pastel colour and then go blonde again, just like the pink did. Boy I was wrong! I loved my blue hair, but it was very hard to upkeep. The blonde was beyond saving so I ended up going dark brown over the top late last year. I feel like now is the time for me to head back to blonde again, and hopefully not ruin it this time! Being able to wash light pastel colours in and out of blonde hair should keep me entertained for the forseeable future (fingers crossed, I am a rather fickle wee bird as you can see)

My hairdresser Paddy works at Rainbow Rooms George Square, who are Scotland's hair colour experts, so I knew I'd be in extremely safe hands. Paddy managed to transform my hair from copper, to lavender and mint green as you can see in the first picture - all in the one appointment! The colour correction was a three step process. First he cleansed my hair to begin to break up and lift out existing colour pigments. Then after drying and evening out the condition he used a palette of pastels to create the final look. The last step was treating my hair again to improve condition, correct the PH balance and increase the shine. Not bad for a first visit! The pastel mermaid look started to fade after a week or so, leaving the slightly brassy blonde underneath, so we squeezed in another appointment before new year to lighten my locks even further.

// Before //

// After //

Paddy lightened my hair again and introduced the lavender only to my roots, fading them into a silver grey. The blonde underneath the silver tones is now a very white blonde base (rather than being quite warm as it was after the first visit) so as it starts to fade it will grant me with a bit more time to play with until my next appointment. For both visits Paddy used Schwarzkopf Fibreplex, which is a three step system that prevents damage from hair colour. Despite all the work that was done on my hair on those two visits it is still in great condition, and I think the Fibreplex really breaks down boundaries and allows you and your stylist to make hair colour about what YOU want or need, rather than what would normally be achievable. I don't think any look is worth damaging your hair for, no bloody way (Plus, my Mum would kill me. But she loves Paddy! Hi Mum) The Fibreplex really allowed my colour to be pushed to the limit and still stay in fantastic condition.

The natural light is still so dire at the moment, I'm struggling to take any good blog pictures (bring on Summa'!) But we managed to get a snap of my hair during a walk around the Burrell Collection on Sunday. This is how it's looking after a few washes. The white blonde underneath doesn't need colour corrected, so even with the silver starting to fade it still looks pretty cool toned. I'm keeping on top of it using Daddy-O purple shampoo from Lush, along with the matching conditioning bar (which I'm struggling to use properly and not sure if I like it, any tips?) I've also done a big thing for me which is not wash my hair every single day! I know how bad this is for your hair and it's even worse when you're trying to conserve colour. So I also got the No Drought dry shampoo from Lush which is working out an absolute treat. I'm finding that curls stay in better in non-washed hair, so that's been a nice little surprise too. If someone could just teach me how to put even curls on both sides of my head that would be great, haha. Paddy is available for complementary consultations for colours or restyles, so don't hesitate to give him a call if you're wanting to make a change to your hair in 2016. He also contributes a lot of content to Layered Online, which is a great online bible to have a nosy at style inspiration, useful tips and how to's when it comes to hair. I braved my first try at a vintage up do for New Years Eve, so I think this is definitely the year I'd like to master how to blow dry, pin curl and style my hair in different, more adventurous ways (and do it properly!) Moving forward I'd love to start introducing more pastel colours to my hair on top of the strong base Paddy has done for me. For now, I am in love with the Lavender ♥

Jacket - My Grans // Top - River Island // Black Jeans - Sheinside // Shoes - Iron Fist @ Spartoo

Not a very noteworthy outfit as I am literally wearing the only jeans which are comfy right now! I'm cleansing this week though and back on the healthy wagon, so I hope to beat dat Christmas bloat soon. Chocolate and cheese every day for a month is something I hope my body forgives me for quickly. Also been giving the love again to my Gran's vintage fur coat, which is super warm, and surprisingly keeps me very dry in the rain. THE CARE BEAR SHOES THOUGH. They are not appropriate rain attire, at all. Hurry up summer so I can wear nice clothes and take proper blog photos again. I hope you are all having a fantastic 2016 so far!

Things have been pretty quiet on the work front for me so far in 2016. TV jobs normally don't start to appear until early February, so I've been taking advantage of this time to focus on my Forever Living business, get some 'life admin' done, and take part in other little projects and experiences while I've got this chilled start to the year. Every day feels like a blank canvass, and that excites me so much. You know how I said before that we should do something every day which scares us? Well for every week of the new year which has passed so far I've tried to really push myself and do things totally out of my comfort zone. If you never try, you'll never know, right? The first week in January I signed up as a Glasgow Catsitter through Cat In A Flat, last week I went through to Edinburgh to shoot with a photographer I'd never met before - Impish Eye, and next weekend I'll be going up on stage at the Clyde Auditorium to get recognition for my recent Forever Living promotion. Even on days where my anxiety takes hold I want to look back on this year and think girl, you nailed it! I constantly have that inner dialogue trying to figure out the best balance between self care and confidence building (Thank you Lynsay for helping get my brain around that phrase and truly understanding what it means to me) I'm trying to dip my toes in the water as much as possible, and go with my gut feeling rather than sitting there for too long pondering 'is this water too cold, too hot, too choppy?!' The thought of going through to a city I'm not familiar with, to work with a photographer I've never met before was pretty daunting. But I really clicked with Michael over instagram, so thought why the hell not! The water felt warm, but my goodness Edinburgh was cold...

Jacket - Topshop // Necklace - Freedom @ Topshop // Snood - Storyhorse // Top - Topshop //

Dress - Dolly & Dotty // Shoes - Dr Marten // Rings - Noxious and Bloody Mary Metal //

Nails - Swoon

We took a wander around some hidden nooks and crannies of Edinburgh, away from the bustling main streets and crowds of tourists. It was a fun little urban exploration and I noticed things about the city and the buildings which I had never seen before. These are only a handful of images from the shoot but I'm really glad with how they turned out! Michael is a fantastic photographer and I was really drawn to his instagram - his photos are extremely atmospheric and each one tells a little story of its own. I was interested to see how his style and eye would capture me - prancing about with my pastel hair, polka dot dress and tattooed arms! I wore this Penny dress from Dolly and Dotty but put a silver Topshop top over it, and I popped some pink glitter on my eyes to match my hair and lovely new nails from Lia at Swoon. It's amazing what a slick of lipstick, some glitter and a pretty dress can do on a day where your confidence is slightly lacking. Along with seeing the outcome of the photos, so thanks very much for that Michael! I'll be back in the capital at the end of the month to visit the Lush Spa for Pete's birthday, so if you have any good recommendations of nice places to eat after our chilled out treatments then do let me know. Have you done something brave in 2016 so far? I would love to hear your stories.

Jeez guys, I need to be honest. I literally have no idea what I'm doing these days when it comes to makeup! I love all of the products which I use, but I feel like I'm on autopilot when it comes to their actual application. I decided to film a video for the first time in aaaages, chatting about makeup and using some tutorials to see if I could mix up my routine a bit and improve my technique. It's a long one - sorry about that! It should only really last 10 minutes but I spend the last 5 addressing a little something which has made me feel a bit deflated this week. High five in advance if you manage to watch the whole thing! After making this one I definitely know what I would do differently next time, I'm extremely inexperienced when it comes to vlogging - I take my hats off to all of you who do it on a regular basis! You must have the patience of saints. Any suggestions or feedback would be much appreciated ^_^ Thinking of doing this once a month if there's anything in particular you'd like me to chat about?

(My favourite part of the video is totally the cats wandering around in the background, especially when I speed it up for the actual makeup application! Haha)

Tutorials used:
How to contour and highlight by My Pale Skin
Contour and bold colourful makeup by Itslaurendotcom
Easy eyebrow tutorial by Mayra Touch Of Glam

Products mentioned:
Real Techniques Miracle Complexion Sponge
Urban Decay Brow Box, Brow Tamer Gel and Brow Beater Pencil/Brush
Illamasqua Precision Brow Gel
Smashbox Step By Step Contour Kit
Skinny Dip Glitter Unicorn Makeup Bag
Benefit They're Real Mascara and They're Real Tinted Primer

I'm not quite sure of the etiquette and if I'm supposed to list every single piece of makeup I've used during this? There are links above to the ones I mention in the video, any other details you'd like to know then just holla! Also, in relation to the last 5 minutes of my chat, here is a link if you want to read up on Forever Living's gold award from Investors in People and the DSA Consumer Code of Practice.

Special thanks to Urban Decay, Smashbox and Benefit for helping me up my makeup game! All opinions are honest and completely my own, as always ♥

Last week my lovely boyfriend turned 27 and it ended up being a four day celebration full of food, tattoos and spa treatments. On the Wednesday, Pete ended up taking the day off work (before his planned days off on the Thursday and Friday) because he's having mega back problems at the moment. That's what happens when you get oooold (Just kidding, I'm 27 this summer too. HALP ME) I'd had plans of running a few last minute errands that day, and going to Wholefoods to buy stuff for a nice birthday dinner and his birthday cake too. But OF COURSE the wounded soldier ended up complaining that he wanted to come with me. So the game was a bogey in terms of foodie surprises. I even tried to hide the birthday cake but they gave me it in a box with a see through top. I'd done quite well in hiding his presents anyways (this sorta thing becomes a bit of a challenge when you live with someone) so wasn't gonna beat myself up too much that he'd seen his cake, despite me trying my hardest to be a birthday ninja!

On the Thursday morning we went for some birthday brunch at Cafe Strange Brew, a little place which has recently opened up just around the corner from my flat. Their coffee is fantastic, and I'm totally addicted to these poached eggs on sourdough with bacon and smoked chilli hollandaise! This is the second time I've had it, and I'm going there again for a meeting tomorrow and already dreaming of dem eggs. My oh my.

After brunch, we drove over to visit my family and then went to Cineworld at Silverburn to see The Revenant. This is the first time we've been to the cinema in ages, and pretty much had the whole place to ourselves. It was so quiet! I really enjoyed the film, it was beautifully shot but pretty damn long. So long that I actually fell asleep for the last 15 minutes and missed the bloody ending! So yeah, Leo could have been abducted by aliens for all I know. Pete sorta explained to me but I was half asleep as we were walking back to the car, I'll need to google the ending and see what actually happened haha. We were so stuffed after brunch and all the cinema munchies, that we just had cake and decided to leave cooking our steak dinner until Friday night.

Birthday Cake

On Friday we met my Dad for lunch then headed over to Irezumi to get Pete's final birthday present (and a little something for me too) Thank you so much to Darryl for fixing us up with these matching beauties! Pete's is on his upper arm, and mine is on the side of my thigh. Really pleased with how they turned out. By the time we got home, we were too tired to cook... so ended up ordering Dominos. Promising each other we would have this birthday steak on Saturday night instead... (SPOILER - we didn't)

Dress - Spartoo // Cardi - Sheinside // Bag - Spartoo (old) // Bag Charm - Boden // Shoes - Gift from a friend

On Saturday we were up bright and early catching the train through to Edinburgh to visit the Lush Spa. I got Pete and myself (Wow, I'm good at making his presents work for the both of us eh!) a voucher while I was working at Lush over Christmas. Everyone was saying how amazing the Spa was, and ironically the first appointment we could get for a couples treatment was on his birthday weekend. The treatment we got was called The Good Hour, and it was absolutely amazing. It's a full body massage with a nautical theme, and sea shanties plus the noise of crashing waves and birds off in the distance being played throughout. I don't want to reveal too much about the experience and ruin the little quirks and surprises, but it was honestly brilliant and we can't wait to go back and try another treatment. Both of our therapists were very professional and made us feel welcome and comfortable. They explained the massage as if our bodies were ships and our muscles were the ropes, with everything being untangled, loosened up and prepared before we set sail. I look as if I'm on another planet in that photo above, and to be fair I was still on cloud nine after the massage (hence the rosy cheeks and unruly hair) Have you ever tried a Lush Spa treatment before? It was so different from any other traditional massage I've had. Struggling to choose what I'd like next when we go back!

After the Spa we went and grabbed a late lunch at the Hard Rock Cafe then went to the pub for a few beers so Pete could watch some of the football. Edinburgh is lovely but it ended up getting mighty wet and cold as soon as it got dark, so we didn't wander around for too long. By the time we got the train home and walked back to the flat... we were too stuffed and tired AGAIN to cook that bloomin' steak dinner! We ended up having toast and falling asleep on the couch haha.

The Lush Spa is in the basement of the Lush store in Edinburgh, so we couldn't resist having a wee nosy around before we left. I bought quite a lot over Christmas and in the sale, but having a bath a few times a week means that my supply is running seriously low. The Lush Spa gift box contains some products exclusive to the Spa and is a perfect way of giving yourself a pamper at home. Inside is Dream Time Temple Balm, Full Of Grace Facial Serum, Golden Slumbers Bath Bomb, Big Blue Bath Bomb and Peace Massage Bar (plus a selection of beautiful postcards in the envelope on the lid) We were given a fresh version of the massage bars used during our treatment to take home, which I thought was a rather nice touch (mines is Hottie, and Pete's is Wiccy Magic Muscles) I also got the Unicorn Horn bubble bar, Flowering Tea Bubble Bar, Rub Rub Rub Shower Scrub, Herbalism Cleanser and T For Toes Foot Powder. We actually have around 8 massage bars now, so I've moved all the bath bombs and bubble bars into my Experimenter gift box which I got for Christmas, and I'm using the Lush Spa gift box to house all of our massage bars from now on. This should be more than enough to keep me going for the next wee while. If you'd like a more in depth review of any of the above be sure to let me know!

Alas, on Sunday we FINALLY cooked Pete's original birthday dinner. Man it looks hella ugly, but I promise you that steak was delicious (he managed to nail the medium/rare, good lad) and I could eat rosemary potatoes all day errr' day. This is the first meat we've cooked at home in a good while, we seem to be going down the vegetarian route without even really realising - and to be honest I think we both prefer it. Pete was off work again on the Monday, so with dinner he had a couple of 'craft beers' which he picked up at Wholefoods, because what else should one expect from such a place! I was on the Strawberry Woo Woo Funkin cocktails (sans alcohol) with some frozen berries used instead of ice cubes. Dangerously delicious if you're adding booze, they're so tasty and easy to drink. However I'm trying to get into a better routine this week as I start a 7 week telly job on Monday. No more mid week drinkies or late nights binge watching Luther for me!

I really don't get why people hate on Valentine's Day so much. Every week there seems to be something new on the internet for people to get mad at. Facebook crazes, memes, outrageous celebrity gossip, controversial tweets. I just wanna stand back and say, Y U SO ANGRY people?! Save your passionate energy and that fire in your belly for stuff which actually matters. I understand that some folk see Valentine's as a money making machine for the greeting card industry, but isn't every holiday/celebration? I just love Love, and wanna celebrate the shit out of that all year round. But hell, if there's a special day dedicated to the patron saint of lovers, then I'm all for it. Ahead of this weekend, I wanted to share a massive chunk of love and appreciation for all of the fantastic women in my life. This February 13th isn't just the day before Valentine's day, it's also Galentine's Day!

'Oh, it’s only the best day of the year. Every February 13th my lady friends and I leave our husbands and our boyfriends at home and just kick it, breakfast style. Ladies celebrating ladies' - Leslie Knope, Parks and Recreation

My friend Jacs got this amazing Leslie Knope tattoo by Danielle Rose (who also did my Dexter portrait) to celebrate all the awesome ladies in her life, with the quote 'Ovaries before broveries' below it. The irony of Galentine's day this year is that it's also mine and Pete's 1st anniversary! So I'm looking forward to chilling out with him as well as my gal pals over the weekend. I got the gorgeous Valentine's Day Flowers from Blossoming Gifts and the card is by Emily McDowell. She has such a beautiful way with words and all of her work is well worth paying the postage from America. This card is for a very special friend of mine, I won't mention who, but I sorta hope she doesn't read this post until after the weekend haha. If you want to treat any of the blissfully loved up or sassy single ladies in your life, here's my top pick of gifts for your gals:

1. Fries Before Guys tote bag - £17.75

2. Nice Raptor compact mirror - £13.25

3. UGH mug - £11.00

4. One Thirsty Bitch hip flask - £20.65

5. Move On Honey cushion - £24.85

6. All You Need Is Love print - £18.30

7. Don't Touch Me tank top - £28.95

8. Su nday Is For Snuggling blanket - £24.00

9. Personalised luggage tag - £8.00

All the items from my gift guide are from Zazzle. After ordering some nice personalised Christmas pressies from them, I dug a lot further into the website when researching business cards and discovered a whole treasure trove of goodies. As well as being able to completely customise almost any product imaginable, I also found some awesome designers who have predesigned little collections of items featuring their own artwork. Some favourites I stumbled across were Amy Grace, The Kitschy Cat, Origami Prints and Keiko Prints. Zazzle have some fantastic gift guides on the site but I really think that they would benefit by offering a 'shop by designer' option too. It would definitely make certain styles easier to find (if you don't fancy customising or uploading your own designs) as the volume of products on there is slightly overwhelming! Alas, dig deep, customise, and thou shall be rewarded! My best friend Leah heads off on her travels to Canada early this year, so we are planning on getting little matching girl power tattoos before she goes, something fun and uplifting just like Jac's LK piece. Thank you to Blossoming Gifts for being my early Valentine and sending me the beautiful flowers (and a the 30% discount for you readers! With the code BGIFTS33) Along with Zazzle for helping me out with a top secret lil' personalised leaving present for Leah. Shut up, I'm not crying, you are...

“All I can tell you today is what I have learned. What I have discovered as a person in this world. And that is this: you can’t do it alone. As you navigate through the rest of your life, be open to collaboration. Other people and other people’s ideas are often better than your own. Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.” - Amy Poehler

This one is for my ladies. Thank you, for everything ♥ And keep being awesome!

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